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Writer's pictureJomtaralets

Marrying an Expat

Updated: Jul 26, 2019

This post has already been published to another website but with the same writer. (this is an edited version 2019)


Love Beyond Borders



This is how I met my special girl somewhere in 2013. The girl that I’m now married to, and this is how our love story began…

Marrying an Expat


The day I met my wife was during a programme initiated by ASEAN  (Association of Southeast Asian Nations) at the Universiti Kebangsaan Malaysia (National University of Malaysia) on August 15, 2013.



At that time I am a government employee in the Philippines under the Office of The President under a regional office while taking my masters in Development Communication at the Benguet State University. I thesis book about eco-tourism was one of teh submission when I applied for the registration for the said ASEAN programme. And Lucky, I was chosen as one of the delegate from the Philippines.


My ex-girlfriend (my wife) at that time was also working in a a private Public Relations Company in Kuala Lumpur and she also submitted her registration to the ASEAN secretariat and she was chosen as one among the delegates for Malaysia to join this programme.


Our First Meeting:


We first met in a getting to know dinner arranged by the the organization’s Secretariat after the arrival of almost 100 delegates from the ten ASEAN countries.


The conversation was a normal social interaction introducing our own culture and race. As an Igorot from the mountain ranges in Cordillera in the northern part of the Philippines, Philippine tourism was among my talking points at that time until we finally found teh word LOVE.



My wife is simple and caring, but sometimes a bit hard headed. Despite me knowing that, I still love her.


During the programme, we’ve been to different places in Malaysia. We went to Malacca, Kuala Terengganu, and some parts of Selangor. It was fun. MALAYSIA IS TRULY ASIA.


According to my wife, she fell in love with me because of my sense of humor, being enthusiastic and gung-ho, and always putting the needs of others before me. (wow, I’m a bit hmmmmm…)


As the programme ends, the time had now come to say goodbye. It was hard to utter the words because in those months, weeks, and days of various environmental education/exposure, not only with her but also other delegates, the experience was amazing.


I remember those times we spent together till midnight – making our reports, journals, press releases, and lay-outs using my outdated Photoshop…hehehehehe…


By the month of December, she came all the way to the Philippines to see me. I told her to come to my place, see my situation and I told her what to expect. That included my culture, work (salary rate as a government employee), family, and my way of living. I toured her around Baguio City and some parts of Benguet Province, Philippines. I know in myself that I had proven to her that IT’S MORE FUN IN THE PHILIPPINES.


As year 2014 approached, she was back in Malaysia for her job. We maintained our communication via social media and phone conversations.


She Transferred Her Career to Philippines


Come March, she decided to transfer her career to the Philippines with an offer from a company in Makati.


So we maintained our relationship. I traveled to Manila and likewise with her to Baguio whenever one was free.


Our relationship was a bit tiring in traveling because I was working in Baguio while she was in Manila. There is a distance of about 344 km (estimation), approximately 6-8 hours bus ride depending on traffic in EDSA.


During that time, we had our programme funded by our mother ASEAN organization for a youth oriented programme in the Philippines, particularly in Benguet Province. The project went well, of course with the help of my home government agency (Philippine Information Agency – Cordillera Administrative Region) in the Philippines.



The first AYVP CYEL programe to empower youth about Climate Change conducted in the Benguet Province.

I also accompanied her to travel to various parts in the Philippines except for Mindanao area. We went to different places in Luzon and Visayas Region. She covered our expenses for those trips (sorry for me because I had a financial crisis at that time), but she was aware about it.




So as the relationship  goes on, I finally met her parents in Johor Bahru for Chinese New Year. The experience was new to me. We went to different places and it was my first time in Singapore Changi Airport. The experience was awesome.


Come August 2015, I proposed to her and she said yes. We prepared our documents including all legal aspects.



I resigned from my job to make sure that our documents would be ready. As early as March 2015, I already prepared myself with the documents that would be necessary for our wedding day.


It was not easy to resign the job that you 'been wanting to but i have to sacrifice it.


After the proposal, I told my parents about it. My parents helped me to set the date. My mum and her mum communicated via WhatsApp.


December 5, 2015. It was our big day and it was celebrated in my hometown. Her parents came and to my surprise, even her 80 year old grandma attended. I’m so lucky to have her and to be with a loving family in Malaysia.




Marrying an expat in the Philippines is somewhat challenging as it requires a lot of preparations from both consulate.


At present we came back to Malaysia (2016) to start our new life as husband and wife.


Stay tune with my upcoming stories which may guide other couples out there that has something similar to our humble yet memorable experiences.



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